Not Another Lame Movie Review...

Kidnapping Miyabi

2011-12-08T13:56:00.006+08:00

Main casts: Alessia Cestaro, Hardi Fadhillah, Kevin Julio, Maria Ozawa

The story basically goes like this:

A group of 3 college kids' idol, Maria Ozawa aka Miyabi is coming to Jakarta. Feeling excited, they decided to meet and greet her at the airport but after some crazy mishaps, they ended up kidnapping Miyabi. But, Miyabi actually missed her flight and they got the wrong girl.

My take:

Rather lame storyline and some over-acting especially the fake Miyabi. If they exclude Maria Ozawa in the movie, I think nobody wanna watch this. Try rename this to Kidnapping Losmah and see got ppl wanna watch onot.. hahaha :P

I rate this movie 3/5 buttered popcorns.

oh btw, Miyabi is a pretty porn star in Japan who is very famous in Indonesia:

So, enjoy the movie!

High Tension

2011-09-26T10:57:00.003+08:00

Main casts: Cécile De France,Maïwenn Le Besco,

The story basically goes like this:

Alexia and Marie travel back to Marie's farm in a small town and a sadistic murderer broke into the the house late at nite, killing everyone but tied up Alexia while Marie managed to escape. Then Marie fight back to save her friend from the sadistic murderer. Read more about this here.

My take:

The story is quite entertaining as the mystery of why that guy wanted to kill the entire family. However, the ending is not something new. Too many movies use this formula and after knowing the reasons, the movie is somehow sounds ridiculous and some scenes are just doesn't make sense..
I rate this movie 3/5 buttered popcorns.

So, enjoy the movie!

The Reef

2011-08-24T11:00:00.003+08:00

Main casts: Damian Walshe-Howling, Gyton Grantley and Adrienne Pickering

The story basically goes like this:

A group of friends went snorkeling in the open sea only to find their boat breakdown and sinking in the middle of the sea. They have 2 options, either to wait for help which no one knows when will that be, or swin 12 hours to the nearest shore. But they forgot that there are sharks. Read more about it here.

My take:

The story is quite intense as you can see the friends are desperately in need of help and glimpses of sharks hovering around them in the middle of the sea. Not too much gore but seeing each of them end up being the sharks' snack is *ahem* entertaining :D

I rate this movie 3/5 buttered popcorns.

So, enjoy the movie!

The Ghost Must Be Crazy

2011-06-30T15:18:00.002+08:00

Main casts: Wang Lei, Mark Lee, Dennis Chew, John Cheng, Henry Thia

The story basically goes like this:

The movie breaks into 2 stories. The first one is about the army where during one of the exercise night, 2 veteran soldiers encountered ghosts in the jungle after some unfortunate series of events. The 2nd story is about a man who is facing bad luck in love asked for some blessing from the spirits and got what he wanted but have to face the consequences. Read more about it here.

My take:

The stories are highly predictable. If it’s a comedy, why I just chuckled only once or twice? If it’s a scary movie, why I wanna fall asleep while watching? Not really entertaining and some of the scenes are just too unrealistically overboard.

I rate this movie 3/5 buttered popcorns.

So, enjoy the movie!

The Roommate

2011-05-25T16:30:00.004+08:00

Main casts: Minka Kelly, Leighton Meester

The story basically goes like this:

A new student Sara checked into a college and met her new roommate Rebecca. Rebecca started to be overly protective of Sara and do crazy to keep Sara by her side, including murdering Sara’s friends . Read more about it here.

My take:

The story is nothing new, crazy roommates. Too many movies are based on this theme oredi lorr..

I rate this movie 3/5 buttered popcorns.

So, enjoy the movie!

Marriage with a Liar

2011-04-28T11:36:00.003+08:00

Main casts: Chrissie Chau, Him Lau

The story basically goes like this:

Few days before marriage, the couple Jerry and Kiki had an ‘accidental’ fling and both are covering their flings from each other. Then comes their friends discovering their flings and promised to keep quiet for not spoiling the marriage. Read more about it here.

My take:

The story is so-so, the acting also mamatei. But Chrissie is yummy to look at albeit being a bitch :P

I rate this movie 3/5 buttered popcorns.

So, enjoy the movie!

A Little Thing Called Love

2011-04-27T10:34:00.001+08:00

Main casts: Pimchanok Lerwisetpibol, Mario Maurer

The story basically goes like this:

It’s about this young dark specky with braces girl Nam falling for one of her handsome senior P’Sone in school. She did all the crazy stuff to get his attention. Few years later she becomes prettier and P’Sone best buddy P’Top falls for her. She rejected P’Top advances and gather all her courage to express her feeling for P’Sone but P’Sone already attached. Nam is heartbroken and went off to study in the US and they met again 9 years later. Read more about it here.

My take:

This is one damn romantic sweet movie. Love the story telling part and the ending. Might get diabetic by just watching. Dang!

I rate this movie 4/5 buttered popcorns.

So, enjoy the movie!

Bedevilled

2011-04-26T10:13:00.004+08:00

Main casts: Yeong-hie Seo, Seong-won Ji

The story basically goes like this:

It’s about a city girl Hae-won trying to get away from her problem and visited her childhood friend Bok-nam in a remote island, only to find out that she is treated as a slave by her relatives. Instead of helping her, she pretended she did not see anything and ignores her plea to help her escape. The abuse went overboard and Bok-nam started a killing spree on all the people who abused her, including her selfish friend Hae-won. Read more about it here.

My take:

This is one hell of a movie. It shows how a weak a person can be when surrounded by bullies within her family. And how a selfish friend can be. Issshh!!

I rate this movie 4/5 buttered popcorns.

So, enjoy the movie!

Dream Home

2010-11-26T15:21:00.004+08:00

Main casts: Josie Ho, Eason Chan

The story basically goes like this:

A lady who wanted so much to buy a property which she can't afford starts killing the tenants to bring down the property's value. Read more about it here.

My take:

I LOVE THIS MOVIE! The plot is simple and straight forward. The visual is very graphics. We can see how Josie goes around 2 units (neighbors of the unit she wanted to buy) killing the tenants. There is a total of 11+1 people killed in that night alone. All in details! Once a while there is a flashback of her background on how she survive poverty to be barely afford a home of her own but the price keeps on appreciating.

I rate this movie 5/5 buttered popcorns.

So, enjoy the movie!

Machete

2010-09-30T13:47:00.001+08:00

Main casts: Danny Trejo, Jessica Alba, Robert DeNiro, Steven Seagal, Lindsay Lohan

The story basically goes like this:

An ex-cop named Machete is forced to take revenge against a drug king after he killed his wife and daughter and tricked him into assassinating a senator. Read more about it here.

My take:

This is MY kind of movie! Lots of action, lots of gore, lots of badass and hot chicks! The storyline is so so but the action is great. And Jessica Alba. And Lindsay Lohan.. Who cares about her personal life anyway.. I LOVE THIS MOVIE!

I rate this movie 5/5 buttered popcorns.

So, try to enjoy the movies!

Frozen

2010-09-17T11:59:00.002+08:00

Tagline: No one knows you're up there

Main casts: Emma Belle, Shawn Ashmore, Kevin Zegers

The story basically goes like this (shamelessly stole from here):

Three skiers are stranded on a chairlift and forced to make life-or-death choices that prove more perilous than staying put and freezing to death.

My take:

A simple yet thrilling movie. Imagine stranded on the chairlift during winter. Jump down, will suffer broken bones. Sit there will freeze to death. Climb to safety, the razor-sharp cables will cut through ur skin. How? Which way would you choose to die? The atmosphere created is excellect to make you feel as if you are there, making decisions...

I rate this movie 4/5 buttered popcorns.

So, try to enjoy the movies!

Splice

2010-08-19T05:37:00.000+08:00

Tagline: Science's Newest Miracle ... Is A Mistake

Main casts: Adrien Brody, Sarah Polley, Delphine Chanéac

The story basically goes like this (shamelessly stole from here):

Elsa and Clive, two young rebellious scientists, defy legal and ethical boundaries and forge ahead with a dangerous experiment: splicing together human and animal DNA to create a new organism. Named "Dren", the creature rapidly develops from a deformed female infant into a beautiful but dangerous winged human-chimera, who forges a bond with both of her creators - only to have that bond turn deadly.

My take:

Dren is actually not a pretty sight. Bald, eyes too far apart from each other and with legs of similar to goats. Storyline quite ok. But not too interestong and some parts can be draggy. This guy Adrien Brody always got this look of 'fishing for sympathy'. Actually I am quiet curious on how they turn a pretty girl into a hybrid species.

from chick to freak

I rate this movie 3/5 buttered popcorns.

So, try to enjoy the movies!

Fake Identity

2010-08-17T15:19:00.000+08:00

Tagline: A Deadly Game of Cat and Mouse

The story basically goes like this:

Liddis one.. This doctor Nick mistakenly for some secret agent in a black market diamond deal. Then another secret agent Katrine try to help him out of the mess. The taikor of the diamond deal then wanted to kill Nick. Thieves chase police, police chase thieves. Confusing like hell then ending, all open fires and all die except Nick and Katrine. Duh...

Read more of it here.

My take:

I don't really understand what is the story is all about. The storyline is too loose and Val, is not the same Val as in Batman. He is HUGE! During the start of the movie, Katrine is escaping from some thugs and she saw Nick on the way and french kissed him to get away from that sticky situation. After that kiss, 2 strangers can be so in love until both can die for each other. This must be a joke! Oh ya, this movie is also known as Double Identity. Movies with 2 names can't be serious..

If this happens in real world:

Life is so confusing..

Food to go along with this: Plain water as this movie is just like a glass of plain water.

I rate this movie 2/5 buttered popcorns.

So, try to enjoy the movies!

Aftershock

2010-08-16T17:38:00.002+08:00

The story basically goes like this (shamelessly nicked from here):

Based on the Tangshan Earthquake in 1976, Li Ni returns home only to find out that her 7-year-old twins are buried under the debris. She's left with a dilemma on deciding whom she chooses to save, her son, Fonda or her daughter, Fan Teng. She chooses to save her son in the end without knowing that Fan Teng overheard the decision being made. Miraculously, she manages to survive but suffers from the painful memory of her mother's decision. Later, a young couple adopts her but she remains traumatized by this childhood experience.

My take:

A very good movie. Tear jerker. A few touching moments especially when the grandmother wanted to take the mother’s son away to stay in another town after the tragedy. Worth a watch!

I rate this movie 4/5 buttered popcorns.

The Machinist

2010-08-14T11:31:00.000+08:00

Tagline: How Do You Wake Up From A Nightmare If You're Not Asleep?

The story basically goes like this:

WARNING: SPOILERS AHEAD

About this guy Trevor (Christian Bale) suffering for insomnia for one year until his body weight is like skeletal. Everyone is worried about his constant loss of weight and even his boss suspects him on taking drugs. One day while taking a break, he met a new employee named Ivan and things started to get strange. A series of unfortunate events happens and Trevor came to the conclusion that Ivan is planning a conspiracy againsts him. One thing lead to another and slowly the story reveals the reasons for his imsomnia. About 3 years ago Trevor involved in a hit-and-run where he knocked down a kid. That guilt slowly creeps up on him and causes his inability to doze off. At last, he gave himself in to the police, and had his sleep for the first time..

Read more of it here.

My take:

This is an interesting movie but the formula is not something new. Think Beautiful Mind, Fight Club, Identity. But Bane's character is really scary, looking at his skeletal built. Based on reliable source, he starved himself for 4 months with only a cup of coffee and an apple or a can of tuna to have that skeletal look before the shooting starts. All the characters are well-played and the story is keeps you wanting to know what is exactly happening.

If this happens in real world:

Trevor is already a permanent resident in Tanjung Rambutan.

Food to go along with this: Anything except coffee, apple and tuna.

I rate this movie 4/5 buttered popcorns.

Women In Trouble

2010-08-12T08:50:00.000+08:00

Tagline: High Hopes, High Anxiety, High Heels.

The story basically goes like this:

WARNING: SPOILERS AHEAD

This movie is about 10 girls with trouble. They are not related to each other but somehow their trouble has a slight connection. The troubles include stuck in an elevator, infidelity, porn, lesbian relationships, bestiality, and unusual sexual dysfunction, to name a few.

Read more of it here.

My take:

Quite a nice movie to watch. It's entertaining to see how each of them end up in deep shit and see the better side of it and encourage each other to overcome it. And one of the character, a dumb blonde porn star/hooker is very funny.

If this happens in real world:

Isn't this already happens in the real world...?

I rate this movie 4/5 buttered popcorns.

So, try to enjoy the movies!

Accident

2010-04-11T19:21:00.000+08:00

The story basically goes like this:

WARNING: SPOILERS AHEAD

Brain (Louis Koo) lead a team of 4 members hitman creating an accident scene in eliminating their target instead of just killing them like normal hitman does. But one day after executing one perfectly choreographed 'accident' scene, one of the team members was accidentally hit by a bus. Paranoid, and after choreographing so many accidents, Brain believes that this is not an accident, but a conspiracy to eliminate his team. He started to suspect his team members in turning against him and another person who is related to his previous assignment. After all the tensed and suspense moments, finally he found out that what had happened... is really an accident..

Read more of it here.

My take:

Quite nice lah. Something new. But towards half way of the movie is abit boring already. Like no development and towards the ending is like, huh? Actually quite good.. But at the same time not so good. Do you feel like you accidentally read this review? Say yes because I am trying to create an accident scene here. OMG, I am so successful :D

If this happens in real world:

Mr Brain must be really brainy to think of an accident which looks like a real accident, taken into account of so many factors, including timing and human behavior..

I rate this movie 3/5 buttered popcorns.

So, try to enjoy the movies!

Just Another Pandora's Box

2010-03-28T20:52:00.004+08:00

Tagline: 越光宝盒

The story basically goes like this:

WHAT STORYLINE? THERE IS NO STORYLINE AT ALL!!!

Read more of it here.

My take:

THIS IS THE MOST WASTE MONEY MOVIE I EVER WATCHED! WASTE ENERGY! WASTE TIME! WASTE EYE MUSCLES! BASICALLY WASTE EVERYTHING. WORST MOVIE EVER!!!!

Why nowadays HK movies like to combine China's kehlehfehs..? All the voice over.. yuckk!!

The only eye candy is Akiu from Twins.

If this happens in real world:

Well.. Actually living in the real world is also almost meaningless...

I rate this movie -1000/5 buttered popcorns.

So, try to enjoy the movies!

Cabin Fever 2: Spring Fever

2010-03-10T09:13:00.000+08:00

Tagline: This Time It's Spreading

The story basically goes like this:

1) Contaminated bottled water sent to a school.
2) Students drank it.
3) All got this flesh-decaying decease.
4) Army seal up school.
5) Kill all.
6) The end.

Read more of it here.

My take:

A storyline like that, is that even a movie to start with? Embarrassingly bad acting and poor casting. If you enjoy watching scenes like chucking back the fingernail into the decaying finger and sticking them back with glue, really obese girl skinny dipping, bloody blisters on decaying flesh, then this might be a blockbuster to you. Else go and do something better, like reading a blog like this.

If this happens in real world:

Eh, looking at the pollution these days, this is possible ok!

I rate this movie 1/5 buttered popcorns.

So, try to enjoy the movies!

My Ex (แฟนเก่า)

2010-02-23T17:41:00.000+08:00

The story basically goes like this:

One girl committed suicide after finding out her actor boyfriend is cheating on her with another actress. She becomes a ghost and back to seek revenge.

Read more of it here.

My take:

The story is a good scary idea but the storyline halfway through is getting out of hand and starting to sound ridiculous. The ghost is scary but when she starts killing people like literally killing people by pulling them into the room and blood starting pouring out, this is ridiculous. Where got ghost kill people so violent one? Ghost only scares the shit of of people ma, where got so kuajiong one...

If this happens in real world:

Almost half of the world population is suicidal because of infidelity. Me not included in the statistics ok!

I rate this movie 3/5 buttered popcorns.

So, try to enjoy the movies!

Attack Girls' Swim Team Versus the Undead

2010-02-11T13:50:00.001+08:00

Tagline: 利発なiをそう考える

The story basically goes like this:

This school doctor la.. butt itchy go and experiment some virus on the students and all turned into zombies, except the swim team. Becos (hahahahaha) the antidote (hahahahaha) is the chlorine in the pool (hahahahaha).. Then one mysterious girl names Aki come and saved the day. Oh ya, abit about Aki. She is a trained assassin under an evil hamsap master but escaped because she is tired of being an assassin and wanted to go to school after reading some teenager magazine (hahahahahaha). Anyway (as usual), the mastermind behind this mess is the evil hamsap master. Ending all die except Aki la, what else? Oh no, Aki dies too, in the most tragic and stupid way. Duh..

Read more of it here.

My take:

Some boobs and lots of gore but the story is ridiculous. Bad acting and bad storyline but saved by the boobs. Haha..

If this happens in real world:

I wanna join that school..

Food to go along with this: Sushi.. with ketchups..

I rate this movie 1/5 buttered popcorns.

So, try to enjoy the movies!

5 Things You Will Hate While Watching A Movie

2010-02-08T09:48:00.009+08:00

1) Starving morons

Want to eat go restaurants la.. Eat in cinema can see meh? Hope got cockroach in that hotdogs.

2) Talking douchebags

Wanna chat about the movie? Wanna discuss about the ending? Discuss go meeting room la! Or discuss during funerals!

3) Kicking idiots sitting behind

Kick your mader ah kick?

4) Late retards

Worst if late oredi and the seats are in the center of the row. Then excuse me excuse me to the center only realised it's the wrong row..

5) Analytical smartass

Wanna analyse things that people hate while watching a movie? You think what? You Einstein ah?

~~How crappy..~~

~~Adios~~

So, try to enjoy the movie..!

Law Abiding Citizen

2010-01-31T23:01:00.007+08:00

Tagline: Justice At Any Cost

The story basically goes like this:

10 years ago 2 robbers (Darby and Ames), broke into Clyde's (Gerard Butler)home, killing both his wife and daughter. The prosecutor, Rice (Jamie Foxx) then make a deal with Darby where Ames will face the death sentence for murder while he (Darby) will get a light conviction just because he (Rice) wanted to maintain his 96% conviction rate. That's how the system works. 10 years later, while carrying out the death sentence through lethal injection on Ames, he dies an agonizing death but the lethal injection is supposed to be painless. Upon inspection, someone had changed the solutions thus the agonizing death. Moments later, Darby was found in a warehouse nearby, dismembered to 25 pieces. All the evidences leads to Clyde but it's insufficient to charge him unless he confesses that he did that to both Darby and Ames. While in detention, Rice kept pressuring Clyde to confess but Clyde just wanted to prove that the system has too many loopholes. Slowly, while still in detention, he still managed to kill the judge, Rice's boss, Rice's team, the attorney for Darby and Ames and just anyone involved in his case 10 years ago by just executing his pre-prepared plan..

Read more of it here.

My take:

This is almost great movie! It's interesting to know how someone can still kill so many people while in detention just by having the right timing and superb planning. There is a point where I am confused as who is the villain here. Clyde or Rice? The story is well told but the ending is bad. If not of the bad ending, this will a great movie.

If this happens in real world:

Almost everyone in our judiciary system is dead.

Food to go along with this: A Quarter Pounder from McD will be great!

I rate this movie 4/5 buttered popcorns.

So, try to enjoy the movies!

Merry Christmas Everyone!!

2009-12-24T11:02:00.002+08:00

Inglorious Basterds

2009-12-17T09:55:00.005+08:00

Tagline: Once upon a time in Nazi occupied France...

The story basically goes like this:

A team of American-Jews headed by Lt. Raine (Brat Pitt), calling themselves 'The Basterds' on a vengeance killing spree of the Nazis during WW2. At the same time, a girl, whose whole family was killed by the Nazis few years back had her path crossed again with the Nazis while operating a small cinema in France. A handsome soldier who stars in a Nazis propaganda movie decided to push the premier screening of his movie to this girl's cinema not knowing her deep hatred towards the Nazis. So, she came up with a plan to gather all the Nazis in her cinema and half way through the screening, lock up the cinema and burn the whole cinema down. Since this screening is such a huge event, it attracts the besterds as well to infiltrate 2 bombers into the cinema to blow up the whole cinema during the screening. The cinema did burnt down with all the big shots nazis inside, but not according to the original plan..

Read more of it here.

My take:

Wow this movie is a boomz! But I maybe bias because I love Quentin Tarantino's movies. As usual, QT's movies are loaded with dialogs and this is the same. It makes you want to know what they are talking about and how the story goes. The story line is interesting with the nazi characters you love to hate. And the climax ending is awesome.

If this happens in real world:

I wanna join the basterds! ra! ra! ra!

Food to go along with this: Pork knuckles! yummy!

I rate this movie 5/5 buttered popcorns.

So, try to enjoy the movies!

Storm Warriors

2009-12-10T15:11:00.008+08:00

The story basically goes like this:

If you watched the Storm Riders before, the movie is about the brotherhood of 2 heroes, namely Wind and Cloud. This movie starts off with Wind (Ekin), Cloud (Aaron Kwok) and another hero named Nameless (Ho Kaking) defeated by a Japanese villian named Lord Godless (Simon Yam) and his sidekick/son Heart (Nicholas Tse). The trio managed to escape to rebuild their strength before another face off with Lord Godless. During their hideout, Wind found a sifu to build his strength through evil (think Venom and Spidey) while Cloud got his additional strength from the remaining strength of Nameless. Meanwhile, Lord Godless expanded his power throughout China and managed to capture the emperor to get hold of the ultimate power, which is the Dragon Spine (something like a skeletal belt). Before Lord Godless got hold of that bone, Wind and Cloud ~~finish downloading the power~~ intercepted and fight, with Wind looks like a ghost (due to his evil training) and Cloud with his new sword skills. They managed to kill Lord Godless but Wind had lost himself to the evil side and started killing the innocence. Last last cloud managed to save him out from stepping deeper into the dark side but...... (buy tickets and watch la the ending)

Read more of it here.

My take:

Very good CGI. Some scenes looks like 300. Very cool characters and poses. Very nice choreographic. Very sharp audio and sound effects. But I think this movie got the least lines in HK movies. The characters seldom talk. Each of them has less than 10 lines dialog. But the eyes, the action and the music and the whatsnot manage to convey what they wanted to say. Story wise, not very strong. The ending is not complete, maybe a part 3? The 2 ladies (Cloud and Wind gf respectively) are abit annoying with all the names calling (Wan Taiko, Fung Taiko etc). Overall, this is only a feast to the sight and sound.

If this happens in real world:

If you walk and talk and sit and pose like Wind and Cloud, people will think you come from Jinjang. Barn sai yeh!!

EXTRAS:

Can someone confirm that there is a Love symbol on Lord Godless vest?

Food to go along with this: Hokkien Mee and Chinese Tea lor..

I rate this movie 4/5 buttered popcorns.

So, try to enjoy the movies!

Astro Boy

2009-12-02T09:24:00.003+08:00

Tagline: Have A Blast

The story basically goes like this:

Metro City, a city that floats in the sky is highly sophisticated that robots are used everywhere. One day, while doing an experiment, Toby, son of a top scientist was killed accidentally. His father Dr Tenma then rebuild back his son into a form of a robot but his memory is being restored by DNA and a Blue Core as his heart. But later Dr Tenma realised the new Toby that he built is not his son anymore. So, he rejected Toby and long story short, he falls down to the earth surface. On the surface, Toby the robot met some kids and they name him Astro. Back to Metro City, they need the Blue Core in Astro Boy to activate another robot which will help the major wins the election. So the came to the surface and capture Astro to deactivate him so that the Blue Core can be transfered out. But Astro managed to escape this and finally, the major used a Red Core (evil one la) to activate his new robot to fight Astro. Ending who wins? If you can't get this right, poke blind ur own eyes.

Read more of it here.

My take:

Another movie based on a Hollywood's formula. The story almost the same as Lion King. Happy starting, then something went wrong, then the hero joins the normal folks, then trigger back his heroism, then back to his own place, fight evil, ends. Alot of movies is based on this formula, betul tak? The animation is nice not so interesting. But then again, it's a Hollywood's production. Just enjoy the visual. The story can be ignored.

If this happens in real world:

All the people is Metro City will become obese. Remember Wall-E? That's what will happen if we too rely on robots to perform our daily work.

Food to go along with this: Burgers and Softdrinks (in the future, real food is non existence)

I rate this movie 2/5 buttered popcorns.

So, try to enjoy the movies!

Shorts

2009-12-01T08:56:00.005+08:00

Tagline: The Adventures of the Wishing Rock

The story basically goes like this:

It's a simple story of few kids in a small town called Black Falls discovered a little rainbow rock that can grant any wish to whoever is holding it. The wishing rock is fun at first where the kids ask for ridiculous stuff but then when the adults found out, as usual, greed took over and it's havoc.

Read more of it here.

My take:

It's a fun movie if you are a kid. The story is simple and straightforward but abit lame. I think there is a formula book in Hollywood. Peaceful town, something happens, then havoc, then hero saves the day, then happy ending. Oh btw, the movie is called Shorts because it's consist of 4 or 5 short stories, inter-related, all on the rainbow rock but not in sequence. Go figure.

If this happens in real world:

I will take the rock and wish for world peace. Then only ask for unlimited supplies of cash.

Food to go along with this: Something light, like Pocky chocolate stick.

I rate this movie 2/5 buttered popcorns.

So, try to enjoy the movies!

A Christmas Carol

2009-11-29T21:55:00.006+08:00

The story basically goes like this:

On Christmas Eve in Victorian England, an old moneylender named Ebenezer Scrooge being a pain in the ass by scolding people celebrating Christmas on the street, rejecting a request for donations for the poor and needy, refusing to have a Christmas dinner with his nephew and forcing his underpaid staff to beg for a day off on Christmas Day. That very night he was visited by 3 ghosts. The ghost of the christmas past shows him about his own history and how he ended up being an ass. Then the ghost of christmas present shows him the present, on how his nephew make fun of him in his absence and how his underpaid staff struggle because of his stinginess. Finally the ghost of christmas yet to come shows him what is the future lies ahead of him, on how the people feel happy and relief after his death. When Scrooge wakes up the next morning, he repented and started as a new man on Christmas Day and his remaining life.

Read more of it here.

My take:

I never read this story before. And I like the story. The animation is superb. Looks like real people. But the most important thing is, the message of the movie. On how the environment shaped a person's behavior, then the consequences of his action towards people around him and how people react and think of him when he is not around anymore. Do you want to be someone who cause much trouble for everyone and no one remembers you or talk bad about you when you are dead?

If this happens in real world:

If the ghost of the past visits me, most probably he will shows me the junk i ate in the afternoon. Then the ghost of present will show me on the throne, curling my toes with tears on my eyes lausai-ing. Then the ghost of the future will show where the sai flows to and how the Alam Flora people treat the sewage...

Food to go along with this: Turkey ham sandwich and Starbuck's Toffee Nut Latte..

I rate this movie 4/5 buttered popcorns.

So, try to enjoy the movies!

2012

2009-11-24T21:22:00.008+08:00

Tagline: We Were Warned

The story basically goes like this:

Based on the Mayan's theory, the world will come to an end on 21st Dec 2012. This is the story of how a small family struggle to escape the catastrophe by smuggling themselves to join in with the rich and powerful to take refuge in a specially build ship when the world comes to an end. The movie starts with an introduction on the signs that the earth is very sick few years before 2012 and as 2012 approaches, all earthquakes and tsunamis hit the earth causing massive destructions on buildings and mankind..

Read more of it here.

My take:

I think the movie will be better if it goes the other direction. Instead of telling the story of how the rich and powerful people can build a ship and escape, why not just zoom into the life of normal peasants like you. The sad stories on how people prepare to face an event like that. Throw in some emo moments, like Tsunami At Haeundae. So when the story focus on the special huge ship it becomes like a sci-fi movie. Who wants to see a sci-fi movie when the world ends? Show la how a family bidding farewell to each other.. or how people react on such thing.. the tears, the farewell etc... And the movie gives me the impression that rich people's life is only worth saving? Mona Lisa portrait is more important than human lives? sigh.. Anyway, the special effects are awesome.

Food to go along with this: International buffet spread. What? This is an international disaster what...

I rate this movie 4/5 buttered popcorns.

So, try to enjoy the movies!

Shuttle

2009-11-21T12:05:00.005+08:00

Tagline: Never Ride With A Stranger

The story basically goes like this:

2 guys and 2 girls arrived late 1 rainy nite at a not so busy airport. Since it's late, the only ride to the city is the last mini bus. There is already 1 passenger in the bus and adding the 4 with the driver, 6 of them now heads towards to city. But the driver had another plan for the passengers. The ride ends up with screaming, killing, stabbing etc.. just to end with the 2 girls being in the cage, ready to be shipped out as a cargo.

Read more of it here.

My take:

So, human trafficking. Something new in the horror/thriller genre? Not sure if this is new but I seldom see movies that focus on human trafficking. The movie is abit draggy. And how can 2 guys and 2 guys can't even beat a driver and his accomplice knowing very well they are in danger? Anyway, there is some elements of suspense and the motive of the driver is not shown until the end of the movie. General knowledge: Stuff to be prepared in human trafficking includes, a cage, some breads, few bottles of water and a kitty's litter box.

Food to go along with this: Bread and water. But please poopoo in the toilet.

I rate this movie 3/5 buttered popcorns.

So, try to enjoy the movies!

The Unbelievable

2009-11-17T23:11:00.010+08:00

Tagline: Winn and Gunipok Die Die Also Won't Watch

The story basically goes like this:

This is not really a movie but sort of a documentary of the spooky kind. This is originated from a TV documentary 'Guai Tam' in HK. This round, the sifu and the crew travel to Thailand and Malaysia to shoot some haunted places or haunted events hopefully will be able to capture the 'thing' in the camera. There are a few segments in this documentary, all with their own story and findings.

Read more of it here.

My take:

Scary and disgusting! Scary because this is not a movie as the settings and locations are real. Disgusting because some of the scenes shows how the wizards use live animals as sacrifices by killing the animals (chicken, fish, frog, lizard) brutally. But they are also scenes where it's too dramatic until I am not sure if it's real anymore. For example, one day the sifu is tired and that day he didn't follow the crew out for shooting. So the crew decided to try opening a coffin. During the climax, where the host tries to blow some air into the body in the coffin, the sifu suddenly rushed to the scene and say this is too dangerous and can cause death. And at the same time, the host fainted and admitted to the hospital. Isn't this abit too dramatic? Anyway, this is a good scare if you are brave as the music and the mood is there. Luckily I didn't watch this in the cinema. Imagine, if the cinema is empty... the aircon will be super cold....

Food to go along with this: None, as I need my hands to close my eyes.. and peep.

I rate this movie 3/5 buttered popcorns.

So, try to enjoy the movies!

5 Things Not To Do While Watching A Movie

2009-11-16T08:58:00.007+08:00

If you think that's movie name, you need to do a recheck on your IQ. Pronto.

Ok, instead of reviewing movies after movies, let's take a break every 10th movies to look into something else. This round let's explore what are the 5 things not to do while watching a movie. But instead of the things you shouldn't do in the cinema, let's discuss about stuff you shouldn't do while watching movies at home.

1) Multitasking

Yea, watching movies at home means freedom. We can do other stuff as well, like eating steamboat, surfing the net, reading newspaper, sms-ing, yoga etc... But, let's try to focus on the movie.

2) Listening to the ipod.
You've just ~~downloaded~~ bought Bon Jovi's album in iTunes and wanting to enjoy the songs badly but you also wanted to watch Shaolin Soccer. Dude, choose 1. There is no way you can watch a movie and listening to the ipod at the same time.

3) Fastforward

Unlike the cinema, we can fast forward while watching a movie at home. Why fast forward? There is a storyline. Fast forwarding is killing the story. It's a murder! THE STORYLINE DESERVES THE CHANCE TO LIVE! YOU DICTATOR!! *skipping off to drink wong lo kat*

4) Talking

This is not allowed in cinema, same goes watching at home. Please plaster your mouth shut if there is another person watching the same movie with you. If you are watching alone, please plaster your mouth too. This is because your subconcious mind is actually trying to follow the story. By the way, if you start talking to yourself alone, please call Befriender at 03-79568144.

5) State of Art Sound Systems

Yea, you just invested in a RM200k sound systems. The sound is crispy clear with every single explosion sounds like something exploded right in front of you. Unless you stay alone in the whole neighborhood or your house is 100% soundproof, please, your own personal enjoyment is creating sound pollution for 100 people around you.

So, try to enjoy the movies!

Jennifer's Body

2009-11-12T12:08:00.006+08:00

Tagline: She's Evil.. And Not Just High School Evil

The story basically goes like this:

The story is about 2 BFFs, Jennifer and Needy out for the nite to watch an Indie band in action. Some mishaps happens and Jennifer was ‘abducted’ by the band to perform a satanic sacrificial ritual. The band needed a virgin to be sacrificed to boost their popularity but unknown to Jennifer, she admitted she is a virgin (which she is not) because she thought they will not rape a virgin. Based on theory, during the sacrificial ritual, if she’s a non-virgin, satan will possessed the body of the girl, hence, ‘Jennifer’s Body’.. :) Anyway, Jennifer returns from the ritual, half human, half monster and need to eat human to stay fresh and pretty. There she goes, chomping guys in the high school until one day she decided to eat Needy’s bf. Last last Needy’s bf is dead and Needy ends up in the asylum. How? Go watch yourself.

Read more of it here.

My take:

The story mamadei jek but Megan Fox is super hot after she’s freshen up eating guys. But when she is deprived from human’s flesh, she looks dull and tired and boring. That’s the power of make-ups :D Ok, let’s put Megan Fox aside. I think if not for Megan Fox, this movie will turn out to be just another gory kind of high school movie. The other characters are not really outstanding. Or maybe they were outshined by Megan? Oh wait, did I just say let’s put Megan Fox aside? Damn!

Food to go along with this: Lollipops!

I rate this movie 3.5/5 buttered popcorns. (If you think I will say 4/5 because of Megan Fox, you are damn right. 4/5 because of Megan Fox :P)

So, try to enjoy the movies!

American Virgin

2009-11-08T12:35:00.008+08:00

Tagline: Uncut (ok.. this is not really the tagline but I can't find the official one. How about 'Show and Regret'?)

The story basically goes like this:

A Christian girl by the name of Priscilla vowed to remain a virgin until her marriage. She went to college and shared a room with a punk girl. One day the "Girls Gone Wild" crew went to the college for a party and Priscilla accidentally ate a marijuana-laced jello and went high by stripping in the hall full of people. Her act was recorded for the "Girls Gone Wild" DVD. Since she is on the scholarship from the church, she is afraid that the DVD will caused her to lose the scholarship. So, with her roommate and 2 more friends, they went to track down the "Girls Gone Wild" crew to take back the recordings.

Read more of it here.

My take:

Funny? Not really. Entertaining? Sort of. Drama? Almost zero. Storyline? Oklah. That's about it. Maybe the producer wanted to include the Girls Gone Wild element into the movie but I think it fails. The movie is painfully draggy and the jokes are lame. By the way, why are American girls so stupik to flash infront of the camera just for a free Tshirt?

Food to go along with this: Double Cheeseburger with extra cheese and bacons and a big glass of iced-cold coke. At least can enjoy the food without much concentration on the movie.

I rate this movie 2/5 buttered popcorns.

So, try to enjoy the movies!

Invitation Only

2009-11-07T10:20:00.007+08:00

Tagline: Getting In Was The Easy Part

The story basically goes like this:

This movie is about this guy, a school drop out who works as a driver for a very rich businessman. One day, he saw his boss having a sex with a glamor model in the car. So, to shut his mouth, the boss pass him an invitation to a very exclusive party, cater only for the rich. At the party, he met a girl and few other 'first-timer' as the rest are regulars. After a warm welcome, the party begins. But this is not an ordinary party. Apparently all the first-timers are 'pushed' in by getting the invitation from someone else. Halfway through the party, this group of first-timers were hunted and dragged to the stage to be tortured alive, in front of the rich audience. Sick but true, this is their entertainment.Then the story goes continues on how the 2 of them struggling to escape the craziness of the party.

Read more of it here.

My take:

This is the first Taiwanese slasher movie I watched, not to say I watch alot of Taiwanese movie :P. Anyway the movie is entertaining if you like some sort of gory horror. Lots of 'painful' scenes if you know what I mean. Oh, Maria Ozawa cameo as the model is olalah. I quite enjoted the movie as it keeps me seated wanting to know what will happen next or how they manage to survive and escape the mess.

Food to go along with this: Fries with lots of ketchup and maybe a glass of wine?

I rate this movie 3.5/5 buttered popcorns. (3/5 if not for Maria Ozawa)

So, enjoy the movies!

Orphan

2009-11-04T13:40:00.007+08:00

Tagline: There's Something Wrong With Esther

The story basically goes like this:

A couple who lost an infant from childbirth. To make it up the loss, they decided to adopt a kid from the orphanage. At the orphanage, a girl named Esther is sitting alone in a room and painting a beautiful picture. Esther is talented in her painting and social skill and immediatly caught the heart of the couple. So, Esther moved in with the couple. Everything seems nice and sweet until she started to show her real evil side. She managed overturn the household just to achieve her motive.

Read more of it here.

My take:

Pretty good movie. Lots of intense moments. Isabelle Fuhrman carried the role as Esther is quite good where she looks lovely in the beginning and you feel like strangling her towards the end. But there is some similarty with Aaron Kwok's Murderer. Not sure if there is any copycats but this movie is enjoyable and entertaining.

Food to go along with this: Maggi Asam Laksa Flavor and plain water

I rate this movie 4/5 buttered popcorns.

So, enjoy the movies!

MJ's This Is It

2009-11-02T20:45:00.007+08:00

Tagline: Like You've Never Seen Him Before

The story basically goes like this:

No story. This is a documentary on the making of MJ's final concert, This Is It. The director compiled all the snippets from the rehearsals which transformed into a brilliant and awesome journey of the legend preparing himself for his concert. It features songs which he practices in the hall with the dancers and musicians and the crew.

Read more of it here.

My take:

Halfway through the movie, I suddenly felt abit emo realising that MJ is no longer with us. This is how enjoyable the movie is.. All the songs featured are MJ's hits which he performed live with the dancers and musicians. I was wondering, how does it feels for the dancers, who travels across the globe just to audition to be MJ's dancers and being selected. Then few months they are practicing very hard with MJ to perfect all the moves and when the show is about to begin, MJ is no longer here. The sudden feel of lost.. all the efforts.. all the sweats.. is like *snap* gone suddenly. RIP, MJ. You are great.

Food to go along with this: Popcorns and Coke (I enjoyed mine throughout the movie)

I rate this movie 4/5 buttered popcorns.

So, enjoy the movies!

A Perfect Getaway

2009-10-30T15:44:00.007+08:00

Tagline: Let The Games Begin

The story basically goes like this:

6 couples, 2 murderers. Who leh? One couple is nice and lovely, the other couple is wild and rugged and the last couple is like natural born killer. Based on Hollywood’s formula, it’s pretty obvious who are the baddies. The nice couples on honeymoon in Hawaii. That time, another couple got murdered and murderer is still on the loose. On the way they met the other 2 couples. All of them end up at the waterfall thingy and that’s where nice couples shows their true colors. The as usual the bad guys were sent back to their creator.

Read more of it here.

My take:

This movie was shown in local cinemas few weeks ago. The story is ok. Quite entertaining. But too predictable. Not even halfway of the movie can already predict who is the real killers. But Milla Jovovich is in it! That adds extra credit for being yummy to the eyes.

Food to go along with this: BBQ Chicken Wings and Pineapple Juice

I rate this movie 3.5/5 buttered popcorns. (0.5 is for Milla)

So, enjoy the movies!

Wrong Turn 3: Left For Dead

2009-10-29T18:19:00.002+08:00

Tagline: What You Don't See Will Kill You

The story basically goes like this:

Just like the previous 2 instalments, the slasher here is a deformed cannibal hillbilly going around killing people who are lost in the woods. This round, the target is a bus of 6 convicts with 2 wardens travelling across the woods and the killing spree begins! As usual alot of creative ways of killing and finally, all is dead, except the hero. But anyway, last last also he got killed. Part 4 maybe? Oh no....!

Read more of it here.

My take:

*Yawn..* What's new except new ways of killing. The normal gore, arrow shootings, yelling, running, traps.. This is just like the previous 2 movies only the victims are abit different. Btw, I've learnt that by cutting through the knee joint will not break any bones (Biology 101). And it seems like human brain is the best part to consume while fresh..

Food to go along with this: Taufufar with Cranberry Juice

I rate this movie 3/5 buttered popcorns.

So, enjoy the movies!

Babysitter Wanted

2009-10-28T23:52:00.002+08:00

Tagline: No Experience Necessary

The story basically goes like this:

A student, desperately need money to pay for her college fees, took up a babysitter job for a nice couple in the suburb. But the kid's diet abit strange, he eats diced almost raw red meat. Later the girl found out the kid is actually a mini devil, with horns. Then the parents came back and knowing the girl found out the truth, they decided to slaughter the girl to feed the devil kid. End end all fight and with the help of a sheriff, they managed to kill the parents but the kid is missing. A sequel perhaps?

Read more of it here.

My take:

This is just another home alone girl with a slasher hanging around to get her life but with a fresh twist. The story is not really logical but the entertainment values are there. And there are moments of suspense too. Kid with horns = funny!

Food to go along with this: Lamb Chop with Sirap Limau Ais

I rate this movie 3/5 buttered popcorns.

So, enjoy the movies!

Black Devil Doll

2009-10-28T15:33:00.003+08:00

Tagline: He's A Lover! He's A Killer! He's A Muthafuckin' Puppet!

The story basically goes like this:

One notorious serial killer (or so..) got executed and his spirit went into a puppet belongs to a girl. The puppet started trashy talk with the girl and she fell in love with him (*sic). Then he asks the girl to bring in her friends. When the friends arrive, he basically rape and kill all the friends. End end the girl (his so-called lover) pull the trigger and end the life of the puppet.

Read more of it here.

My take:

Black Devil Doll is one hell crappy movie of all time. Think Chucky with a lot of racist jokes and profanities which makes Beavis and Butthead looks like a Disney production. Cheap production. Lousy acting, lots of profanity, racist jokes and lots of boobs. And gore. That's about it. Oh ya, this movie is rated X. By the way, do you notice that there is a car explosion on the movie poster above? There is no such scene in the movie.

Food to go along with this: Meatballs Spaghetti and Ribena.

I rate this movie 2/5 buttered popcorns.

So, enjoy the movies!

Not Another Lame Movie Review...

2009-10-28T15:27:00.000+08:00

Ok folks. Like this:

Not all movies make it to the blockbuster. Or, not all movies make it into our cinema. How about some that fails to arrive here.

Well, must say that some movies are damn crappy and not worth our 90 minutes but then again, nothing is perfect.

Since I watch alot of movies, crappy or not, I will try to keep track in this blog from now onwards. Also this will also be sort of some movie reviews. With spoilers. Nolah, not the one Ahbeng put on the car one. Spoilers means I will write the summary of the story also la.

So, enjoy the movies!